mixed experience

imagine yourself in a situation where you have to switch your thoughts, focus, (somehow) feelings, and commitments to several things that are quite or a lot different from each other.

how could you switch in just a matter of minutes?

how could you do the transition of the focus and ideas?

how could you consider ambiguity?

how do you prioritize and in the same time try to cater to everyone's opinions and ideas and put them into consideration?

i had 'em for the rest of the week.

most meetings for rumah hantu was handled last week.

but for this week, i couldn't find even a freakin' hour to conduct the meeting.

even the board of committees cannot fit their schedule with mine.

so yeah, everybody's been busy lately.hmmph. :/

nevermindthen.

at last.it's Sunday,ya'll~!!

last night went out for a midnite movie with ehem ehem..

hahaha.

we watched Hikayat Merong Mahawangsa.

and i just LLOOOOOVVEEE Stephen Rahman Hughes.

gooooooossshhhhh~ the eyes....the bod....the smile.......

bbbrrrrrrr~ hahahhahahaha.

like seriously, he's DAMN HOT.

enuff said.

ehehhehe.

and now i'm at INTEC library, hvg an online session with @luluhana and @ejaibrahim.

just now went down to grab some drinks from the 'gedegang' machine.

accidentally bought 100plus.i don't like it that much.

so i took a walk around INTEC and found ehem ehem again.hahahha.

when i reached INTEC great hall, found a taekwondo tournament.

lots of hot,muscular,tall guys.ehhehehehe.

but what they're having there is the one that matters.

they were damn kewl, mann~

all of that kicking and cool moves makes me wanna learn martial arts.

tee hee~

btw, my cousin called an hour ago, she said she's gonna come to shah alam today.

so i guess i'll be joining her later.

long time no see~..hehe.

and perhaps have a drink with mad this evening.been bored and need a good company if i'm going to the tasik later.

usually i'll go alone but i guess today i would want to go canoe-ing.

so, going canoe-ing alone would be pretty much......hurmm,awful.

hehehe.

so yeah..

wish me luck for the coming week!.

we're gonna have a blast!!!..

ahh~ XD

kthanksbye.

currently in class

teehee~
now i'm in Instructional Technology class.
and i did not bring along my textbook.
because i couldn't find it this morning.
there's too much clutter in my room.
am sad bou it actually.
am sad coz i'm too lazy.
n hopeless, perhaps.
-_____________-

we'll only have this class for the day.it's a 2-hour class and it's early in the morning.
it's kinda boring but we have internet-connected PCs, so.......yeah.blogging-time!. :D

we had this kind of class during asasi.
back then, i was doing really great on this course.
but i don't know bout this sem, i take this course too lightly.
i don't nailed it that well like i did before.
hmmph.
it's an avoidable excuse but still, why haven't i do somethg bout it???
erghhh~

kesian dr. johan..ekekekeke
he's teaching in front and since i'm sitting way at the back, i can see that every PCs would at least have a tab opened for a blog.
and most of them are updating.
like i do.
hee hee~

kthanksbye.

life's been good~

been busy lately.as always.haha

actually i got lazy updating my blog - THIS blog and lebih2 lg my EDUcational blog

(which is very crucial for me to at least post 10 posts on that edu blog but it seems like don't give a shit bout it n i'm juz letting it go to crash~ and burnn~................)

ok, i'm sounding psychotic but, yeah.feeling of letting out some stuff.hee hee~

new things about me..been somehow 'different' lately. (not that it's that significant,like,yeah)

i've been single.that's one thing for sure.

(ok,x perlulah sgt sbnrnya nk state kat sini,like,pfft~)

but like yeah,what the hell.

it changed my life.my thoughts and my perspective bout stuff.

it's been rewarding, in a way, that now i know what most people expect in a relationship.

and as sad as it will sound, u should not expect anything.

just let it flow, bro~...ehekhekk.

putting on too much expectations,,and later get hurt or feel dissatisfied or unappreciated.it hurts.

so, let's just put it this way.

"if you expect less, you'll get more. but when you expect more,u'll get less."

-ejaibrahim,2011-

or worse, you'll get nothing.

how's that, huhh????.

hehe.

okay okay.moving on with life.

yeah,been busy lately. (okayy,didn't i just said that few seconds ago??)

nevermindthen.

so yeah..i've not been updating my blog since...............i got busy??.like,crazily busy????.

anyway, i'm gonna have this rumah hantu on the 30th of March.. (mai mai maiii~ jom ramai2) :D

it's for an Enterpreneurship Carnival the faculty been planning to have.

plus, i get to open up my own booth!!!..

woww,this is really gonna be my first time!..ahh~ (sparkly eyes~)

and of course, gonna sell some (a lot) of my preloves and might be selling individium's button badges and tshirts perhaps.

hmmph,haven't contacted that individium person yet but i'm having second thoughts tho because~...............of a very very popular reason. $$$$$

like, duhh~ i'm a student for crying out loud, i don't have the money for modal.sob sobb tsk tskk~ :'O

well, that doesn't mean that i have to cancel everything right???.

hehe.

i believe in this;

"don't let anything get into your way in your pursue of reaching for your dreams. if there's any obstacle, you can just shoot them away like aliens"
ughhhh~...yeah,that doesn't make any sense.

at first it was supposed to be a quotation from someone quite famous but i ended up writing it with my own words halfway through.

pfft~ :

i feel great tho.

i am now able to take control of my feelings and able to tell myself that i should not be 'emo'ing bout stuff.problems.or whatever shit.

yeah, what i had these past few months were just plain shit.

i was angry and perhaps still being angry now but, hey, I TOTALLY SHOULD NOT!. TAK PERLU, NAMPAK BENOR MENIPU. hahaha. i love that movie. :D

anyway...yeah.

now i can do whatever i want. talk to whoever (or whatever) i want. feel whatever i want. be whatever i want to be.

WITHOUT any internal or external CONTROL.

well, yeah, except for religious obligations. O_____o

now it's my time to partayyhh~!.and expand my network.and do whatever i wanna do with beloved,lovely friends.

i guess it's somehow life-changing.in certain things.

but i am still whoever i am before.

i do believe in love, still.

i do believe that i could end up with someone better. (really do believe in jodoh)

i do believe there are better guys out there.ihihihi, where are u?.

and yeah,now it's time to MAKE FRIENDS.

and make BIG things happen.

now everything seems big to me.

coz i don't specify myself to just one important thing anymore.

feel good.be good.ekekekeke.

kthanksbye.

footnote: oh yeah, now i know that you are just not worth it anymore. and yeah, you know who i'm talking about. it's YOU.

crazy weekend

first of all..pengsan sesaat. *HR*

hahaha..

last weekend was..

AWESOME!

TIRING!

MIND-WRECKING!

RANDOM!

EXCITING!

EMOTIONAL!

LOUD!

FUN!

LEGENDARY!

(and any other adjectives yg sekutu dengannya) ;D

on Saturday...

went out with Adib for lunch at Subang Parade..

then to Sunway Pyramid n went home with some friends by train+cab..

arrived home (tired and exhausted and emomo) only to turn up changing to my new oh-so-gorgeous, navy blue party dress and head out to KL

slept around 5.50am the next day with my hair smelling like crap.

on Sunday...

slept only for 3 hours n was awaken by AmirIzuddin's call at 9am..

got up straight away, half-consciously putting on lace hotpants(which is rare to see a girl walking around the neighborhood with short pants) n pink long sleeve, went out for a slight morning walk with ejaibrahim to get a cab, rent a car, went back home to shower n what not then off we go to UKM for KAPREZA ;D

after UKM, we drove to Subang Jaya for lunch+dinner but then ejaibrahim need to rush to KL with the car,leaving me,AmirIzuddin & HaziqRidzuanHR at SS15 from 6pm to 10pm.

why so late??.

ask IzRijap & Akram.

lost-much.

but anyway,without them we couldn't get home.

thanks-much. ;D

n now i'm at the library,writing this blog post while procrastinating on my 8-10 pages PELT report (due in 2 days), pidato skrip for koku (perhaps due in 2hours), Sociology's 2-5 pages reflective writing (due tomorrow!), and perhaps some more assignments which is/are lost in consciousness.

for God's sake,Ita..please start with 'em right away!!! (ok2,maybe after this one post.ngee~)

oh yeah, on Sat i bought INDIVIDIUM button badges at Offline boutique,Sunway Pyramid.

bought half-a-dozen and gave it away to my friends as presents.

i nearly bought the tshirt but i didn't. ;(

btw,it is somewhat cool.

it is based on the idea of Human Periodic Table, as to present people's personality.

i'm wearing 2 of 'em now (button badges) - Fashionably Late(FL) & Procrastinator(PR) on my student ID neck strap.

coolio,my friends check 'em out n ask me about it!.

maybe they'll get some for themselves later coz i was promoting like crazy at TESL square.hihi.

gonna get 'em tshirts later.hmmph.

ok ok,need to get started with my assignments.

i know i'm wearing individium's 'procrastinator' button badge but it doesn't mean i should be one at the moment.like seriously,i can't afford anymore delays.

kthanksbye.

surat (ex-)cinta.

haishh~

ok ok,first of all...i love typing.

because i've put on a nice shade of nail polish.thanx to hafizah zuraini :D

i love to see my fingers jumping around the keyboard..it's like they're wearing a dark pastel pink dress. XD

haha.

actually before ni dah tulis bout somethg..around 2-3 paragraphs (small2 one only)

tapii~... *backspace backspace backspacee~*

sebab i don't think that talking bout what i wrote would help anybody in any situation.

a bit hurt seeing someone posting somethg on FB and i thot by writing bout what i wrote would make him feel the same.just like how i am feeling rite now.

i know i don't deserve someone like you (somehow) but for that one whole year,i've been thinking that i might not the kind of girl that you want.

i realized i'm not the girl of your dreams.u didn't even mentioned that to me before.

i can't give or present myself as someone you want.

u always show me that you always want somethg more than what i have.

i realized i can't. it's just not me to change in that way.

it seems like you are a guy who knows what he wants.n u show that to me.

and what u actually want is not me.i don't think so.u didn't make me think so.

it's just too little too late.

it takes those tears to make it rust.

it takes no time to fall in love. but it takes you years to know what love is.

u said that u've imagined ur whole life with me.

n i'm the reason u are here.

i just hope that you'll found the one you always wanted.

it breaks my heart to know that i'm always not enough.

it breaks my heart i can't talk to you bout how i'm feeling when i'm down.

it breaks my heart that we can't 'play tennis' bcoz u're not good at it.

it breaks my heart when i know the fact that u wanted to be with me but u don't know how to keep me by ur side.

it breaks my heart i slipped out of our love.

it breaks my heart i still have feelings for you eventho i'm pretty sure with my decision.

it breaks my heart i have to make that decision.

i hate the fact that u've been my 'routine' for one whole year.

and i hate it that i have to change it.