Ramadhan is here...again!.

first of all,

thank you Allah for giving me the chance to breathe Ramadhan's air this year.

the month sure feels different than any other.

:)

I think this is my first time ever celebrating Ramadhan here in my lovely kampung, Kuala Lawas.

our previous home back in Miri is now an abandoned government's quarters, waiting for another resident to fill in the space we left.

our space.my room.the kitchen.the living room.

looking back at those years we've spent in that house, surely can make me cry.

my beloved cat, Tipah - we had to leave him pointless about why the house is suddenly empty and us, the family once he had, gone without goodbyes.

okay, now I'm starting to cry for the first time, for him, just because I couldn't bear these thoughts of him before.so I decided to just keep it at the back of my mind coz if I would think about him, it'll definitely ruin my mood.

hahahah feels funny addressing a cat with 'him' but still, he's family. :)

okay, enough of Tipah, am pushing him back to the back of my mind.

Ramadhan.

what can I say about this year's Ramadhan??.

I don't fast since the first day of Ramadhan.haha.

whyy??.I did woke up 3.30am in the morning and had my sahur on that first day.

but my menstrual cycle decided to arrive early than expected, so, yeah. I think I fasted for only an hour that day. T____T

now we're entering the 4th of Ramadhan.

and......still. no changes whatsoever in my daily routine.

so yes, I can say my life is pretty dull and boring for the last 3 months.

except for the fun parts I had with friends and all.

but still, all I do is sleep eat TV.

life's good?. I don't think so. :/

now let's talk about romance.

the ex-boyfriend from highschool years is being the most annoying pain in the neck.

I don't think the idea of recovering the relationship we had before is a good one.

it may sounds bad but #likeseriously, I don't want you anymore, so get the hell out of my life.

coz maybe I'm falling for someone else right now.

and yes, I think I am.

he's the sweetest guy I know.

but I think he's just too afraid to tell me how he really feels.

he doesn't have any problem talking to any other girl but when it comes to talking to me, I can sense a difference.

or maybe it's just a silly hunch but, I don't know. just going with the flow~.....

but, I think I don't want any special relationship with any guy at the moment.

I do admit, I think I kind of like him a bit. maybe a lot coz it feels different and I'll get nervous and all when I see him. I don't know.

but surely if it'll happen between us, it'll be a LDR for sure.

but what the heck, the whole point of not wanting to be in a relationship with any guy at the moment is bcoz I want to concentrate and focus more on my study, without any guy hanging on my mind, thinking of when we should meet and the thoughts of taking every chances of seeing each other every time the chances seem........grabable. (???)

hahahah 4 months of holiday makes me feel like making excuses to make errors on my English.teehee.

so, my point is.......maybe it's possible to just be in a relationship with this guy.

coz it'll be a subtle, stress-free relationship without hvg to think of too much stuff.

;D

so just hope that one of us will finally say something and make it happen.

at least I know I don't think it's gonna be me.

teehee~.

toodles~.... ;D